Youth Expectation
There is much talk about the generation gap - the lack of communication between youngsters and oldsters. The adolescent attitude and the adolescent hope emerges from this survey conducted among the youngsters of our times.
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Stand by us, not over us. Youngsters do not want to be placed on a different level and talked to. But they expect
to walk side by side, with their elders and share
their
experiences and anxieties. They are not very keen on
hearing about "those good old days", but they want to
hear constructive suggestions.
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Make us feel we are loved and wanted. Many parents and adults take youngsters for granted. They think that by working and providing for their material needs and education, they have done everything. Today's
youngsters want to experience love and concern. They want their elders to be interested
in them as people, take time to listen to them. Show interest
in their ideals, values and fads.
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Train us by being
affectionately firm. It is not true that youngsters do not want
discipline. On the contrary,
they like to have clear norms of conduct.
Many
of the heroes of
modern films and plays have no fathers, or fathers who are inadequate or psychologically absent. "If
only just once, they would tell me what they
think I
should do", moaned an American son.
But discipline should not be humiliating, but as
the word means "to make disciples of", it requires love and affection to make it palatable
and reasonable. ·
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Bring us up
so that
we will not always need you. Youth rightly want to become independent, but parents
unconsciously tend to keep their children emotionally tied up to them, because otherwise the parents might feel
"lost" or "unwanted". The childlike love between a youngster and his parents must gradually change to another type- the love of one adult
for
another.
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Try to be as consistent as possible. Practice what you preach. Youngsters are hearing so
many wonderful things, but all around them they see shocking examples in the adults of
every walk of life. This makes them terribly
frustrated that they want to have nothing to do with this "bunch of phonies'. Words may move them, but example
will attract them.
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Don’t try to make us feel inferior.
Every human being has limitations. Youngsters are human too. They
do not want to be nagged all
the time, and told that they are "good
for nothing.' St. Francis de Sales says: You can catch more flies with a spoonful of
honey than with a barrel of vinegar. A positive approach will produce better
results.
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Say "Nice work", when we do something really well. A well deserved compliment boosts up a
person’s ego. In T.A. language, positive strokes help a person to grow
psychologically. In this world of stress and strain,
positive strokes are a must to help our youngsters· keep· their balance.
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Show respect for our wishes, even if you disagree with them.
Tastes differ, so do fashions
and fads. Young people should be allowed to choose their own clothes, their own
hair styles, their careers,
and their marriage partners. The adult should always
be near to offer advice when asked. But adults should not get unduly upset if they do not see eye to
eye with the younger generation. Respect for the person implies respect for his wishes,
too.
